hello December.

“I will make you forget all”>

Hopeless Valentine at GMF 2012.

Nell all day everyday. 



I always relate that the end of the year as a phase to finish everything. 
to settle everything that's due before the year turn to 2013.
and for these past years, December always going to be a very busy months.
for me I have tons of works (presentations, assignments, etc.)

I did not have any resolution to be done before the year ends.  
never made one. 
sort of don't believe in having one would actually prompt myself to fulfill it.
meaningless.

In other related thing, December is also special because obviously

it's my BIRTHDAY! 

and everything is still the same.
I celebrated by myself with a container of moist chocolate cake.
and two chocolate muffins. cioccolato magnificento!
 it's a low-key thing to do. 
it suits with my age, I think. i'm 24. (kalau kahwin dah ada anak dua! ecewah!)
nothing elaborate, just remembering how my age defines me.

and how i feel like certain things are slipping away.
I can not choose which things to forget but I know some things are forgotten in time.
it's not a deliberate forgetfulness but things that you could not hold into.
and I somehow fear that someday I woke up and could not grasp on what it is.
what it is that stained  me, it felt familiar but i do not have any conception on what it is.

ah, I've rambled senselessly. 
must be the Nell's overdose.



p/s: here's hoping that everyone of us have a great and productive December and if the world did end in 2012..........



 :)

jumble bubble up.

haip.

okay, feels like typing away everything.

1. this week and coming weeks would be a pretty busy week.
I have 1,2,3 no make it FOUR presentation waiting for me. two of them are in group while another two are individual effort. and I've prepared none. NONE.

mighty PLUS on the research proposal presentation due this Thursday.
nervous as hell but what to do, things got to be done.

2. I have plan for this coming December to go to the BBW sale. It will be held at MIECC, Serdang so I'll try making up time for it and make my mission to snatch at least a dozen of books.
You know, for next year stock-up.
Because they discounted the books until 95 %. that's CRAZY!
the usual paperbacks costs around RM 31.90 so do the maths, I'll get a book for only RM 8.00!!
so now you know the deal.
 
I've heard of BBW a couple of times before this from my friends but never had the chance to actually go.
so I think this year might be the year for me.

reading books is always my favorite pastime.
being lost in another world and building up imagery from what you read is a freedom that could only be reached by reading.  
which remind me I've yet to finish the memory keeper's daughter.

get over it.

it's June already.


I am restless and bothered these days.
I honestly can't wait for all of this to be over.
surely I'll miss everyone, everything, 
but deep down, I'll be forever glad when things get to settle down.


really looking forward to the holiday with the family as I've plan to make it useful and meaningful, unlike my previous holidays where it mainly consists of sleeping, eating and fattening up myself.

/really in unstable mood. :(

kadang-kadang.

orang hanya berani berkata-kata di hadapan komputer,
mencari kebahagiaan dengan 'dissing' ,


orang berani melangkah jauh ke hadapan,
meninggalkan yang lain di dalam 'mediocrity',


orang itu dilimpahi kebertuahan,
melangkaui 'good timing',


orang itu dihormati, disegani semua,
menunjukkan dia itu seorang yang 'wise',


orang itu berdiam, berpeluk tubuh, kekal tersenyum,
memerhatikan ragam orang yang macam-macam.

reminiscing.

I'm no socialist.
I'm never a storyteller.


and I always wonder how my late father was always able to strike up conversations with just anyone. a passing by stranger, a cashier, a teacher, a nurse, a cleaner , everyone. you name it. and truthfully, I envied this quality about him. I'm not one with the ability to open up or starting out a conversation with just anyone if I'm in no desperation to do so.

hello december

so, 4 days has passed since my birthday..

nothing much happened. no celebration.

just myself spending some time alone.

but I do get a few meaningful messages from friends and families.

that's more than enough, I think.

at least in this era of facebook is the news center, some still consider giving calls and texting as one way of communication, as a way to convey greetings, wishes, etc.

thank you because you don't forget.

in another note, ha! the dean asked to see me. i think because i screwed up my ca. oh, well.

maybe later today I'll see him and let's see what he have to say.

que sera sera.

i can't wait to get out from this hole.

remember september

oh hai.

rase macam da la lame sangat tak update kat blog ni.

rasa macam busy gile macam Najib busy nak bentang bajet. ooh, bajet da bentang ea.

dapat gelanggang futsal, pendidikan free, penjawat awam digalakkan sambung belajar, yada yada yada.

oklah, clap clap clap la untuk kerajaan rakyat didahulukan.

oh,

actually, ni bukan tujuan utama nak update ni.

nak story apa yang terjadi sepanjang bulan september yang lalu sahaja.

*queue lagu wake me up when september ends*

of course, start new semester, maknanye aku da jadi super senior ye. rase otai nak mampos.

jalan pegi klas rasa cam tak jejak tanah, nampak junior lalu buat muka serius sambil tengok name tag mereka.ahahaha.

feeling yg awesome.

ok, clinical kat hospital mcm biasa, class petang2 ade..

aha! nak cerita.

24 sept aritu aku telah menghadiri Korean Music Wave Concert kat Stadium Merdeka.

ok, aku follow kpop. fullstop.

bile aku free, i'll make separate entry for story telling of my experiences there.

then, i have jamuan raya for my course and main point here is,

i think the last year's organizer was much much better organizer than this year's.

no tables and we've to hold the plates. pshhhtt! susah tau nak makan.

and the food is okay la but the nasi impit is way too soggy for my taste. (tp amik 2 pinggan jugakkk)

the next day, ada picnic with the girls at Jeram Mengaji. supposedly, we wanted to go to Jeram Linang but the day before ada klua paper news pasal ada student mati lemas kat situ.

so, tukar tempat perkelahan la kami.

nevertheless, very verily FUN-lah!

em, dengan aktiviti2 di atas dan aktiviti2 lain yg tak layak masuk dlm update ni, I have an ENJOYABLE September.

so, what's up with my October?

well, Langkawi is on the lists. :)

merapu merapa

hola!

EUGHH.. takde mood nak study tapi kene.

eheheh. tengah2 tenung lappy nak taip ape tah.

rumet i balik. then dia kasik 2 potongan pizza. AHAHA. thanx. I LIKE! :))

nampaknye kena study ngan semangat nye.

bye.

-may the pen never dry-

Tablo.

saje je nak berlagak.

saya bakal balik rumah hari ni. ahahahaha

harap2 bus tak la lembab sangat .

dan harap2 saya selamat sampai ke pangkuan keluarga tercinta.

saya akan enjoy weekend ni tanpa notes maupun esaimen. oh heaven.

:)

tata.

fecal!!! on supermarket's trolley !!

ok. aku tgh bersenang lenang kat twitter, tibe2 ImranAjmain@twitter pon share satu linkie.

click

ringkasan:

professor Charles Gerbar (gebar? selimut?) kat University of Arizona medapati tiga suku (3/4) dari shopping carts atau troli kat Amerika sinun, ada mengandungi sisa najis besar (baca :tahi). OK. 72 % dari 85 troli yang diuji di empat buah negeri di US ada kesan sisa najis besar, dan separuhnyanya disertai oleh bakteria E.coli. bakteria paling famous kot.

menurut beliau, amaun itu adalah lebih banyak dari yang biasa terdapat di tandas awam. OK.

skarang fikir, tandas awam kat US ngan kat Malaysia. ERK!!

pasni nak guna bakul je. eh. ke bakul pun lagi banyak kot. takpun tolak troli jgn pegang kat handle tapi pegang kat tayar ataupun gune pengepit nak tolak troli ataupun pakai gloves.

teringat kat troli mydin yg bersepah kat asrama pelajar YU-ES-EM-KAY-KAY.

malas nak bagi title..

well well, tgk date kat bawah lappy baru pasan arini last day January.

betapa masa pantass berlalu..

nanti bulan 2 dah,pastu tiga,empat lima enam tujuh lapan..

pastu sembilan masuk final year dah..adui dui dui~

betapa cepatt masa berlari..

anyway, 2-3 4 ari mendatang bakal bz ngan aktiviti jln2 makan2 cakap2 snap2 ..

ade kenduri perkahwinan sepupu ye..

oh penatnye.

da la assignment tak buat lagi.

oh complicated sungguh.

oh. bunyi ape tu?

erk?

ok, anak sedare berdengkur.

maknenye da lewat. time to sleep ana.

bukan ana semasa kecil.

sakit

bila sakit otomatik akan teringat rumah.

ingat ma kat umah.

pagi tadi aku bangun nak solat Subuh tetibe je rase pusing2..

pastu afta solat, rase nak muntah..

berlari2 anak ke toilet ntok meluahkan ape yg patot.

masuk bilik, baring, letak bam pala then telan painkiller,

tdooo...

at last, tak p clinical n class research..

petang p klas ..

balik tu tdo lagi..

rase penat n tak sedap badan.

uhuk. nak rumah. nak ma.

err...

3 pm- I missed you Abah. so much

3.15 pm- I know you can't be my 'good' FRIEND when you started to complain about my appearances and the way I styled myself.

3.20 pm- how I wish I could sleep like him. as much as I'm a sleepyhead, I still can't sleep in the class during lecture.

3.30 pm- I missed home.

3.35 pm- why I feel like I have no spare time lately. the constraint of learning process.

3.39 pm- Jokes are half meant. when you keep joking of how I was never a thin girl and I always look fat to you, I truly understand it. so stop.

3.40 pm- It's tricky when you listens to the lecture at the peak of the afternoon as you starts to daydreaming and losing your mind to somewhere else. like right now

3.45 pm- I'm a major spelling freak so it bugs me big time when people keeps on mis-spelling without trying to learn the proper spelling.

I jotted down this while sitting in the class at 3 pm today.

now I believe shit happens in life. my supposedly Thursdays CME have been advanced to this Wednesday. *head desk* ( buh-bye my precious sleeping time)

in a more positive view,my fictional story (not like the other girl) that I wrote for Gogumafics won Best Heartbreak Story(oneshot category)!!! I'm a happy young woman!

never thought my story would be getting much love. :)))))

for the first timer like me to saw my names being put up on the lists along with other established writers made me fly like a G6.(ok, lame).

and the more super better happy news spazzing to the max is the winning story will be translated to Korean language and send to S.Korea for the collaboration project. my STORY!! haha.

and plus my author's note will also b included too~ awesome to the max.

now imagining the lovely image of Yonghwa and Seohyun sitting on the yellow couch reading my story.

*cloud nine mode*

since I'm a self-proclaimed bipolar, now I'm down to the core ground as I SUDDENLY remembered my assignments, reports and presentation that needs to b done.

tak boleh kah mereka semua self service saje. ??

*dush dush*

2nd day of '11

feels like the longest time since I posted in my blog.

since today is holiday (YIPPEEE!!) so saya rasa nak wat entry panjang dan nk letak pictures, boleh? boleh? and this is random posts okay..HAHA

SO, here we go..

1. the first lesson that I learned this semester besides the clinical demo.

MAMMOGRAPHY.

nota mammo yg tersadai di atas tilam.

agak menarik walaupun terpaksa tegakkan kepala selama 3 jam d waktu petang yang sejuk..da la slides mak aih! bukan powerpoint dah tapi word point tu wahai lecturer ku sayang..

antara point2 penting dlam pelajaran tu ialah;

kawasan berisiko tinggi ntuk dpt kanser payudara ialah kawasan belah atas yg bhg luar..50 % ye..

kalau ade rase lumps tu jgn risau, wat check up dulu bcos tak semestinya malignant..kalo benign takpe..

mammo begins at 70's lagi..

Siemens yg first wat Mo tube then GE follows..

and there's male mammogram.

2. haha! yg ni kelakar.. one of my friend gave me this one BIG RINGS!! it's pretty but too big for me.. anyway, thank you so much!! tapi kena fikir nk pakai mcm mane ye.. maybe guna kat tudung je la kot.. kalau kecik sikit da ok. :( sayang sebab design dya BLACK STAR!

cincin yg berada di atas lappy

3. and and hari ni tak makan nasik langsung bcos malas nk p kafe.. n bukak2 je mata tadi pon da pukul 2.30 PETANG! (okay, sungguh tak elok amalan ini)..so malam2 yang sejuk begini mula la lapar n pegi pantri nak amek apple lam fridge pastu nmpak ade org jual blueberry cheese tart n fruit cheese tart.. so aku mmg suka pastry2, cakes, etc pon ngan senang ati p beli.. rm 1.50 satu..

aku beli yg fruit tart tu.. ok la rase dya..not bad..nanti nk beli yg blueberry plak..

kan bagus pantry ade jual mende2 camni.. sesuai ntok org2 mcm aku yg malas nk kua.. nak makanan dtg terbang dgn sendiri..harap pasni makin byk ye brngan jualan..

fruit cheese tart sebelum dimakan

4. this is my latest addiction.

Cadbury Bournville Dark Chocolate berlatarbelakangkan awan (ke?).

ouh! nikmat. aku biase beli yg kosong ngan yg ade almond. misti restock, kire keperluan yg perlu ade dlm drawer meja.. harga tak mahal..rm 5.90 je.. kalau stress atau rase nk berada di awang awangan boleh la rase.. tak yah isap 'salvia bong' macam cik Miley Cyrus okay. cukup mkn dark choc je.. lagipun dark choc byk benefits nye.. natural antioxidant, tak menggemukkan, can lower your BP (must ask mum to eat it), can lower your LDL Cholesterol(the BAD cholesterol) by 10 percent (have to persuade my sister to love Choc as well), and it also can stimulates endorphin yg leh wat kita rase tenang saje..

tips nak mkn dark chocolate + getting all the benefits;

1. jgn la makan satu pek chocolate tu dlm sehari.. memang la boleh gemuk kalo wat gtu..makan sikit2 je.. dlm 1/3 dari satu bar pon okay..

2. taste the chocolate! baru dpt rase ke-rich-an chocolate tu.. jgn la sumbat je dlm mulut tu.. take your time okay.

3. pilih DARK choc.. dya ada more antioxidant than white or milk chocs.

4. JANGAN minum susu after makan chocs. ade kajian kata minum susu secepat mungkin selepas mkn choc maybe akan menyebabkan antioxidant tak dapat diserap oleh body kita.

itu saje dr saya kali ini sebelum kembali menjadi busy bee kerana esok dan hari seterusnya class from 8-1pm then 2-5pm.. MENARIK!!

Getting an education really is an annoying diversion :(((

and tadi ma call.. huhu.. rindu tetibe.. dapat cakap ngan farish debab tu sekejap .. haha.

BONUS

farish ikhwan tersenyum manesss mengucapkan HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011!! ;)))

back here

so I am here for the sixth semester.
time really flies away...


I left my room key at kerteh.
how stupid. and clumsy me strikes again.
the last time, I left my hp charger..
and I owe my room mate a lot.
have to make it up to her..

and for the consequences of me getting lazy not packing up stuff in the room+not returning the key,
TADA!
a pink letter from the office.
tuntutan dikenakan: RM81.00

and one more thing.
why the hell they didnt upload the academic schedule for us?
why did they posted it at the academic office when the semester starts tomorrow?
who'll be going to the office when most of us just reached here today? *sigh*

on the side note: I LOVE Rihanna's Loud album. currently looping it.

and btw, currently Malaysia is playing against Indonesia for the first leg of final of AFF Suzuki Cup. the current score is 2-0.

the laser incident lands Malaysia on the 1st spot of twitter's trending list with #malaysiacheatlaser

whatever it is, hope Malaysia stay strong. GO GO Malaysia!

LJ

meme-ing my LJ account in my blogspot.
pathetic?
so be it.
mostly I dump fictional stories there.
together with drabbles..

etc.


words by words

if have time can go there.

to heal..

Okay, now I discover that I have to calm myself.
to think that my life is miserable is over rated when you compared it to more profound problems that the world is facing currently.
so I have to be grateful and learn to cope with whatever miserable-ness I felt.

my method to overcome this is:

I read Adam Young's blog today AND he write such awesome insights. *hangs head in shame*
He wrote what he felt with utmost sincerity that it strikes your heart at the right place.
No wonder he made awesome songs.

I listen to a song by Kate Havnevik, Think Again where the music is arranged by Adam Young himself. It's a beautiful song and her voice is .. just listen to it yourself

I wrote a couple of drabbles in my LJ.

I watched latest episode of Yongseo. they are beyond adorable.

I take bath in the cold nights and it's refreshing.

go to sleep with empty minds and wake up in the morning with a resolution to be a better person.



I wonder how I can be hopeful and miserable in a span of 15 minutes. am I bipolar?

adab dan hormat

okay.

story time.

since 2 paper checked, so time to breathe easily again.

review: 1st paper- ok kot

2nd paper: tak ok sgt. tak ckp preparatn.

berbalik pd tajuk entry kali ni,

mengikut wikipedia, adab bermaksud konteks perilaku, perbuatan: kebaikan, kesantunan, moral, sopan santun, kesusilaan, kemanusiaan.

aku pon bkan la penuh beradab tapi...big TAPI kat sini ye.

(entry ni khas ntok sape2 yg bakal jadi rumet aku dan juga sedang mnjadi rumet ye)

1.kalau rumet aku tgh tido, aku kua blik try tutup pintu pelan2..

BUKAN lepas je pintu tu camtu. BEDEBAMMMM!

2. aku ckp phone kat lua tau even ckp ngan mak atau ank sedare..

tapi kamu leh je selambe diri ckp ngan pakwe merengek2 dgn volume tahap 5.

(aku bkan jelez tapi imagine kalo aku tgh stadi, ok aku bkan la slalu stadi .tu takpe lg tp bayangkn aku tgh smayang pon bleh je bermanja ngan tepon. ) RESPEK ok.

3. nk masak lam blek boleh, tapi kalo msk benda berbau mcm keropok ikan tu kan, agak2 la ye.

abes pakaian sy berbau. da la skang musim ujan, nk bsh bj susah ye. bj br pkai skali tetibe ade bau lain plak. ANGIN ...

4. kalo membe dtg blek kan, aku no hal tapi kalo aku tgh tdo atau stadi, pliz la jgn borak jerit2. .

membe ko kat seblah je pon, bkan nye dya kat padang ko kat bilik..

5.ko nk bgn awal bleh, nk bkak lampu terang2 pon leh, nk bkak lappy pon takpe tapi tolong la kalo nk dgr lagu ke ape ke pliz la gune earfon maupon headphone. murah je kot. 2-3 rm da dpt.. aku tak ingin nk dgr lagu2 BEIBER tu ok. maupon lagu2 yg da oudated. ok sedikit KEJAM di ditu.

kesimpulannya, aku walaupon bkan la manusia tersopan kat muka bumi ni tapi bab2 simple camni aku try jaga. biar la aku tak suke cmne pon kat sape2 tapi ble da jadi rumet automatik RESPEK tu ade ye.

takkan la sume aku nk kne ckp face 2 face.. kang tak bertegur sapa susah plak ye.

common sense je sume ni.. tak payah bkak buku forensik sains ke cari kat google ke.

sekian.

exam OOO exam

It does not matter how slow you go so long as you do not stop

-Confucius-

*phew*

tinggal lagi 4 hari 1st paper ntok musim periksa kali ni..

paper nuclear med.

tapiii...

notes tak abis2 lagi.

baca 2-3 page, then stop jap..

#chorus#

bkak soompi..renung twitter..bkak YT..tgk WGM..makan..toilet..daydreaming.. = 2 JAM

tgk nota balik..

then ulang balik #chorus#

MACAMANE la nak abis nota..

da la aku ni slow..nak paham satu-satu slide pun mau bocor CSF..

da la dabel dose kot paper..

7- nuc med

8-diagnostic

2-2 paper kat atas killer subject..nota mcm kitab kuning ..

pastu ade lagi dabel dos next week nye..jadual sket punye chantekk!

15-rad protectn

16-arab

17-19= RAYA haji

22-phy hum body

25-dosi >>>>>super killer subject!

28.11-9.12 = pre klinikal..

maknenye birthday aku kat sini..

*sigh*

life as a STUDENT.

ntok kawan2.. selamat menempuhi exam ngan jayanya..

do the BEST!

a family is so close yet so far....